From hilarious to cringe-worthy, we have ’em all here.
Despite the general public displeasure with all things on the Internet come April 1, the big companies in the tech space just can’t help themselves. Year after year we get tons of April Fools’ Day jokes, gags and pranks. Most are flops and some are worth a chuckle, and no matter how well they go over we’re rounding them all up right here.
Google Photos emoji search
You can search for pictures in Google Photos by typing out a name, place or object … but why not emoji? Well, even though this is a bit of a joke, it actually works in Google Photos. Drop a dog, pumpkin or whatever other emoji you want to search, and you’ll get proper photo results in return.
‘Drop the mic’ in Gmail
Some email threads go on too long, and really need a “drop the mic” moment where you can shut everyone else up. Now with the latest development by Google, you have a specific “Drop the mic” button that’ll put in a well-timed animated gif to put a stop to all of that, and swiftly archive the conversation. Just like the emoji search in Google Photos, this one is actually available to use in Gmail on the web.
Update: This one’s been pulled after minion GIFs started infiltrating work emails, purportedly getting one unfortunate user fired in the process.
Inbox by Google gets emoji Smart Replies
Again with the emoji, this time in Inbox’s genuinely useful “Smart Reply” feature that intelligently selects phrases for you to reply to emails with. Why not let Inbox choose a few poop emoji for you to respond to that terrible email with?
Google Cardboard Plastic
Sure, virtual reality is cool and all, but Google is already gearing up to tackle the next big breakthrough with Google Cardboard Plastic. By being the first headset for Actual Reality, Google Cardboard Plastic offers the most immersive experience yet. Because after all, as Google puts it: what’s realer than real? Probably nothing.
T-Mobile Binge On Up
The Un-carrier is debuting Binge On Up, a “revolutionary new hands-free device that lets you watch whatever you want and do whatever you want.” Aimed at solving consumer pain points like Netflix Neck and YouTubular Degeneration, the device offers Theater Mode, Dual View, and Real Reality, through which you can binge-watch your favorite shows during everyday menial tasks. Here’s what John Legere thinks of Binge On Up:
Verizon OccuCam connects your eyes directly to social networks
Verizon has announced that it is working on a new wearable camera called OccuCam that will connect your eyes directly to social networks, letting your friends and family see what you’re seeing at any given time. After all, what’s better than sharing all your precious moments with your friends, family, and that guy who won’t stop commenting on your tweets?
The carrier is also working on apps to augment the experience:
- Cat Watch — Kooky technology instantly recognizes every time a cat comes into view and instantly blasts it directly to all your social channels, so everyone you know can marvel at the cat’s hilarious antics.
- Cheat-ID — Players – you’re warned. Cheat-ID knows when you’ve been looking at an attractive individual just a tad too long, whether they’re a coworker, an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend from high school, or even the hot server at the fast-food drive through. Wandering eye? Cheat-ID will automatically alert your spouse or significant other about the potential for trouble.
ASUS ZenFone Max charges your Tesla
ASUS likes to tote the size of the battery in the ZenFone Max, and today it shows off just how powerful it is by powering up a Tesla Model S with a comical-looking charging adapter. Electricity, how does it work??
Samsung unveils Internet of Trousers
Samsung has unveiled Internet of Trousers, a range of IoT-enabled smarter fashion products. The trousers come with Wi-Fly, which could save you from potentially embarrassing situations. Says Samsung:
Gone are the days of unnoticed, unzipped trouser zippers upon exiting the restroom. Should your fly remain open for more than three minutes, the ZipARTIK module will send a series of notifications to your smartphone to save you from further embarrassment.
The pressure sensors detect prolonged periods of inactivity and send notifications to get you to move every hour. If you’re idle for more than three hours, “devices embedded in each of the rear pockets send mild electrical shocks to provide extra motivation.” The pants also come with a Bio-Processor that measures your perspiration level and heart rate, sending you subtle notifications “as a reminder of the importance of keeping your cool.”
There’s also a Fridge Lock option that prevents you from opening the fridge if the “tension around your waist gets too high. The fridge door lock can then only be deactivated with consent from a designated person such as your mother or significant other.” Samsung is opening up its ecosystem to other vendors, making the ARTIK chips available for everyone interested.
Google Express has a new delivery technology
Google Express is looking to the skies for its latest delivery technology: parachuters. Quiet, reliable, and gentle, Google says that they’re the “perfect marriage of form and function.”
Google’s AMP constructs the Very Large Mobile Page Accelerator
Google’s AMP (Accelerated Mobile Pages) technology is aimed at decreasing page load times on mobile devices, and the search giant is now focusing its attention on finding the elusive “secret” to fast-loading pages. This is where the Very Large Mobile Page Accelerator (VLMPA) comes in:
In the VLMPA, two beam pipes containing mobile web pages gradually accelerate their atomic units of content to equal and opposite speeds of 0.999999999c (only about 0.7 mph slower than the speed of light) and collide them with one another.
Detectors around the point of collision analyze the burst of elementary articles that result from this explosive impact. Tracing the paths of these phenomena with the VLMPA will allow us to uncover clues to the nature of dark content, pursue the origins of mass media in all its dimensions, and investigate what happens to spurious antimatter, otherwise known as the misinformation space.
For more on the subject, head to the AMP project’s website.
Sony wants to catch ghosts with the Proton Pack
Sony’s Proton Pack has a “state-of-the-art, miniaturized superconducting synchrotron, which accelerates injected protons from a hydrogen plasma cell.” It’s purpose? To catch ectoplasmic matter (ghosts, for those that didn’t see the Ghostbusters). And yes, it’s slime-proof:
In development for over 30 years, the Proton Pack benefits from the newest innovations from Sony Corporation’s acclaimed products. Weighing 6.66 kilograms/14.68 pounds, the Proton Pack incorporates the same STAMINA mode featured in Sony Mobile Communications’ latest Xperia™ smartphones, allowing its user to keep the battery going longer. The Proton Pack integrates the same super slow motion capture capability as Sony’s Cyber-shot RX series premium compact cameras, allowing users to capture the matter in 960 frames-per-second high frame rates and accurately record the movement of its target.
Its embedded Sony 4K Ultra Short Throw Projector allows users to view captured matter in real time. Near Field Communications technology will make it possible to connect the Proton Pack wirelessly to other Sony products such as BRAVIA televisions and Xperia smartphones to view, forward, and share entities, redefining the terms image capture and screen grab. The Proton Pack is water and slime-proof.
Engage SnoopaVision on YouTube
Snoop Dogg is back with years of experience in code and a mindset to lead a team to really take YouTube to the next level. Forget 4K and 3D, how does 360 video sound with Snoop Dogg? Introducing SnoopaVision! Essentially it’s the same 360-degree tech already deployed on supporting YouTube media, but with added “GG”. What more could one ask for?
Google Play Books launches “new” eBook device
Introducing the best thing to happen to eBooks since the PDF.https://t.co/Jevw9xEF4U
— Google Play (@GooglePlay) April 1, 2016
Google is launching a new Android device that can just just one eBook. It will finally allow users to fill up those empty bookshelves with lots of eBook devices.
Google launches self-driving bike
Yes, the bike joins the self-driving car project at Google
Chrome Chromebook
Made with “tungsten space-grade chrome engineering with revolutionary new microchrome technology,” the Chrome Chromebook is the shiniest Chromebook yet, with the mirrored facets reflecting over 4,000 lumens right into your eyes. As Google says, the industrial-grade chromium and clear coat “shine like a supernova.”
Google Maps takes you to Funky Town
Open up Google Maps on your Android or iOS device, and perform a text or voice search for something like “Take me to Funky Town” or “Disco Mode”. Maps will show you a short, disco-themed, animated video.
OnePlus wants to cover everything in a sandstone finish
After identifying several objects as being particularly slippery, including cups, sneakers, soap, and the iPhone 6s, OnePlus has sought to solve this problem by covering everything in a sandstone finish.
Do you have a favorite Android-related April Fools’ Day joke on the Internet this year? Let us know in the comments!